But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect. No, I worked harder than all of them—yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me. -1 Corinthians 15:10
1 Corinthians 15:10 says, “By the grace of God, I am what I am.
I am beautiful, strong, brave, determined, blessed, and loved. None of this is because of my own doing; instead, it is the grace of God within me. Not to say I only have good qualities, because I am a sinner who lives in a fallen world.
As I write this, my heart is racing with severe anxiety and fighting clinical depression. I claim to fully trust God, yet I am beyond miserable believing the lies and negativity in my head. The thoughts go against everything I read in the Bible. They are based on my insecurities and worldly interactions.
I am too strong to be defeated by such evil, ridiculous thoughts. I know better. My Lord takes cares of me, and desires only the best for me. No person or no thing can touch me without His permission. And He has plans for me, plans to prosper me and not to harm me, He loves me so much, my Heavenly Father sent His only Son to die for me. I know this.
Still, shamefully, I try to push through my illnesses on my own, when He has given me everything I need to fulfill His purpose for me. The second part of 1 Corinthians 15:10 says, “I worked harder than all of them- yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me.”. This is accurate as I have lived a more difficult life than many, I have had times when I have turned away from God, yet He has never left me. The grace of God understands why I need constant reassurance God is who He says He is, and will continuously prove He is Jehovah Jireh, my Provider. It is the grace of God who created me, and understands me more than anybody. And He continually gives me grace to hold on and push through another day.